These
are all quotes from the diaries my aunt Mary kept as a young person. For those
new to my friends list, I have posted about her a lot. She’s my mom’s youngest
sister, who died in a car accident in 2007 after a 17-year drug addiction. I
found years’ worth of her poetry and journals after she passed away.
Anyway, these things were written in journals throughout the early to mid 1980s,
when Mary was in her teens and early twenties. This is how she explained
herself to whoever she imagined reading her words in the future:
“Dearest, kindest world with endless opportunities,
Be nice to me and give me a little freedom, and just a few things to enjoy.”
-Summer 1980 (she was fourteen years old)
“I wake up in the morning and shake dreams out of my hair.” -July 1980
“I would gladly give away my creativity to all my friends.” -1980
“Dearest, kindest world with endless opportunities,
Be nice to me and give me a little freedom, and just a few things to enjoy.”
-Summer 1980 (she was fourteen years old)
“I wake up in the morning and shake dreams out of my hair.” -July 1980
“I would gladly give away my creativity to all my friends.” -1980
“Life can be good and
life can be treacherous. That’s why they say it has its ups and downs. Then
again, death is more than often caused by ups and downs, so to live is to die.”
-July 1980
“I love loving. It’s
the ultimate in a deciding factor. It’s the difference between reality and the
supernatural.”
“Touch the stars, they’re breezing by.”
“When people smile, I smile too. When they cry I cry. When I don’t see them I wonder what they are feeling and if they think of me.”
“Next time you want to understand me, look between the empty pages behind the lines.” -1981
“Words stuck in my throat are released beneath my pen.” -1981
“Touch the stars, they’re breezing by.”
“When people smile, I smile too. When they cry I cry. When I don’t see them I wonder what they are feeling and if they think of me.”
“Next time you want to understand me, look between the empty pages behind the lines.” -1981
“Words stuck in my throat are released beneath my pen.” -1981
“We are the young ones crying out.” -1984
“Take me as I am: alone and dreaming, a poet without a plan.” -April 1984
“What is written shall remain.”
“Maybe I’m not star material, but I know how to feel and be real.”
“You speak of the coming days. I speak of today and laugh a lot. Your crazy smile keeps me going.”
“This is Captain Mary aboard the cosmic ship Bethany [her hometown]. I am quite alive and enjoying this evening. I am at the head of my bed, in full control, and the music is real cool.”
-February 14, 1985
“I am the living Dead:
ahead of my time and behind.”
“I’m filling in words that shouldn’t be said between bound covers.” -1989
“If I die soon, I want everyone to know my life was good. If I live longer, then everyone will know they helped make it that way.” -January 1989
And this last one was written in 2004:
“I dedicate my words to everyone I’ve ever known, dead or alive, or will ever know, dead or alive.”
“I’m filling in words that shouldn’t be said between bound covers.” -1989
“If I die soon, I want everyone to know my life was good. If I live longer, then everyone will know they helped make it that way.” -January 1989
And this last one was written in 2004:
“I dedicate my words to everyone I’ve ever known, dead or alive, or will ever know, dead or alive.”
*****
Rest in peace and poetry,
Mary. You’re a supernova that will never stop bursting into life.
